Today has been a success. Every day that I spend not eating is a success. I also finally got some weed, the helps me calm down so much. The stress I'm under right now is crazy. I think I'm going to go buy a macbook tomorrow morning. I've been trying to excuse myself for spending so much money by telling myself that it's all the money that I won't be spending on food. It's the only thing that works.

I have a long night ahead of me.I only slept 2 hours last night but it doesn't look like tonight is going to be much better. And it's all my fault. I spend so much time inside my head, obsessing over hunger and perfection that I cannot bring myself to care about school. And then I'm stuck hours before the deadline trying to make something half decent.

Everything will be better when I'm skinny.